A Healthy Stepmother . . . meets an Omama.

Here in Portland, Oregon, we have the daily newspaper, the Oregonian. One section of the Oregonian is called Omamas, as in Oregonian Mamas. It’s about all things related to families.

Today, I was so happy to meet Heidi Williams of the Omama staff in person. In addition to her other duties with the paper, Heidi has begun writing about stepfamilies, often focused on stepmothers. It is wonderful to have that aspect of family life represented, especially since the number of families with children living in two homes is growing each decade.

We spent a great hour exchanging viewpoints on the big issues and I know I came away inspired and encouraged and even more committed to this path that has led me to writing and bringing voice to the stepmother journey.

Here’s a sampling of the topics Heidi has written:

That’s My Evil Stepmom

Honoring Stepfathers

Blended Family Portrait

and

Stepfamilies Around the World 

You can also follow Heidi on Twitter @by_heidi.

I’m very excited to have met Heidi, not just because she’s local, but because every story about a woman engaged in healthy and constructive lives with her husband and stepchildren is another story we can add to a growing narrative of caring, compassionate, and concerned stepmothers.

Stepmothers everywhere have an opportunity to influence how stepmothers are perceived in our culture by building good content online. Have you ever gone to YouTube and searched for stepmother? You will find some things there I can’t even say here, they are so disgusting. We need to begin to add story after story to that medium and build up a catalog so the positive stories are the ones that float to the top. (If you do go there, maybe you’ll find Santa Sophia, a Christmas story I wrote about a stepmother and recorded in my voice.)

The same with Google or any other search engine. The more we blog, the more we use Facebook or Twitter, the more real-life positive stories will be found. Gradually and slowly, we can replace the negative content about stepmothers with a more fair and balanced viewpoint.

So, today when I met Heidi, I was excited for the big, long-term future that stretches out there into a time when our children are adults and having families of their own. Their lives hold the same statistical odds as our own, with a 50/50 chance they could become stepmothers and stepfathers. It would be so wonderful to imagine that we are cleaning up the cultural image, opening a healthy dialogue, and creating a more supportive environment so they will have an easier time of it than we are having.

I can dream.

4 thoughts on “A Healthy Stepmother . . . meets an Omama.

  1. Enjoyed reading the links, thanks! I’ve been thinking about the group that will be formed in the new year in Portland….sounds so wonderful….wish I lived in Portland to be able to be part of it (maybe I’ll take a road trip out some day 🙂 I recently suggested to my partner that he ask if he could receive your emails as well….so he can hear the issues first hand, and not have me leading him to the trough (sorry, that’s my horse gig at play again!) Does this work for you?

    • Hi Shelley, I’d be honored to have a husband or two reading my blog. Most of the ideas will apply to any human in any role, I’m just focusing for stepmothers here.

      On the sidebar of any page, right above the photo of the laughing woman jumping over the chuckling man, there’s a place to click to sign up by email. That’s the simplest way.

      And stay tuned for some online options for participation. Lets done let technology get in our way of giving and getting support. Soon!

      • Amazing, Kim! Looking forward to giving and getting support anyway I can get my hands on it! Every day I wonder about the choices that need to be made, and would love to bounce the ideas off someone wearing the same shoes.
        With 5 years under my belt (but living in a very different reality than I first thought ) could share some of the road I’ve walked….I don’t have any single local friends (divorced, never married) who are in relationships with men who have kids, but have really benefited from this blog. So appreciated. Thank you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s